Have you ever broken up with a long-time significant other? Maybe you’ve ended a life-long friendship? Lost a loved one? Been fired or laid off after pouring your heart and soul into a company for 10+ years?
No matter what it is, we all have had major events that have created significant changes in our lives causing us to separate ourselves from part (or even all) of our identities.
This separation of our identities can cause us to feel empty and lost, and as we explore these changes we look for ways to fill the void.
A midlife crisis is what we commonly use to describe these turning points where we explore these new changes and adapt new behaviors to fill the void. For a lot of people, these behaviors can look a lot like they have become derailed, turning to sex, drugs, rock and roll, fast cars, strippers and Las Vegas.
While this can be fun for a while, people who turn to these vices start to realize that they still feel unfulfilled after some time — and they often dive deep into these vices, taking the chance that their midlife crisis will be destructive.
If you live your life making impulsive decisions, you will end up feeling dissatisfied with your life and growing the gap in your identity further.
So, how can you avoid this???
The key is to flip your mindset and think of the changes in your life as a midlife awakening — an opportunity to realize and step into your full potential. This effectively shifts your mindset from “what makes me feel successful and complete” to “what makes me feel like I am contributing and growing”.
Essentially, you adopt a growth mindset.
When you look at the major transition in your life as an opportunity to realize and step into your full potential, everything changes.
Your behaviors follow your mindset.
You make more thoughtful choices, and work on identifying what brings you meaning. Taking the time to pour energy back into yourself allows for you to really consider what you need in your life to feel fulfilled.
And eventually, this will bring you more fulfillment into your life because finding meaning is (at least in part) what makes us human.
However, if you live your life making impulsive decisions, you will end up feeling dissatisfied with your life and growing the gap in your identity further.
How can you pivot your mindset to embrace these changes amidst these significant changes in your life??
Ask yourself the following questions:
And finally, be kind to yourself!
It is okay and completely normal to become unhappy with what others might consider the “perfect life” — others cannot set the standards for your fulfillment.
Whatever stage you might be on in your journey, we are here to help you! Feel free to reach out to us at firstname.lastname@example.org to see how we can support you today!!
Brenda Lee is a Leadership Development and Team Building expert to some of the world’s most exciting entrepreneurs and professionals who have all the trappings of success but have hit a barrier they are ready to breakthrough.